Art in the Dark

So for majority of my life I had fantasized about being an artist or photographer or just anything with super bright colours. I never went after it though, my dad had always taught me that the worst thing in the world was to embarress yourself in front of others. So quiet little me hid behind books and shyness, until a few years ago. Im a saver, so Ive built up quite the bank acount and last year I figured, hey what the hell Im gonna buy a super nice camera. My mom put in 200 dollars from my bribe to go to a therapist and I paid the other 400. I was the proud owner of a Nikon D300. Woot! This year, my final year of high school I signed up for both an Into to Art class and a Photography class, best thing I ever did. Im currently making a sculputure for Art Clubs Art in the Dark show. The shits gonna rock. And photography?, well lets just saw if i could wake up every day and take pictures for ever Id be perfectly content. But wait, I can do that, and get paid for it. Artist isn't in my future, Im much too impatient for such things. Art is just a hobby for now but photography, its gonna be so much more.

The illegal plant

I know how to stop my self from being depressed ever again... weed. oh if only it weren't so completely illegal. Maybe if some of my friends weren't against it, and maybe if it wasn't so expensive. Oh darn. On the slightly less dim side Im having a halloween party. But then to make it a tish more dim, my boyfriend won't come. Something about... National Guard Weekend? Psssh yeah right, like he actually NEEDS to go to that (just in case you are offended that was my attempt at sarcasm). Also I feel the need to share this blog with more than the... one? person who is a follower. Dear one person, THANK YOU! However somedays I like to pretend I have friends so we shall see how things turn out. But for now the illegal plant has made me sleepy. Goodnight Lovelies.

The Horrible Things that Get Us Money

I need a job, need is used lightly. Truth is I'd be okay with out a job for quite a couple months but i figure its easier than being board at home all day long, right? I applied at Barns and Noble last week but they havn't called me yet. Plus, the more I thought about it the more I really didn't want to work standing up for endless hours. And hey, if they wanted to hire me they would have called. So I send in an online application to Spicy Pickle just 2 minutes ago. But my dad told me about this pharmacy intership thing where you actually get paid to hand out perscriptions and get a degree sort of thing to be a pharamcy tech... interesting.

Four letters.

Hate. Carved into skin
Hate. Bled from my leg
Hate. Feeling poured out of me
Hate. Written four times
Hate. Pencils are razors
Hate. Its killing me
                            Hate... Four Times On My Leg

Are you Strong Enough?

Life is lost everyday. Feelings are pushed behind a smile. The pain bleeds from a wrist. And these little lips wished they were left unkissed. For innocence was long ago lost. And those times were happy. Our cries for help are lost among the noise. But soon the cries will rise above all other noise. And all that will be heard are two single words... "Help me."

The Beginning, I suppose...

I am now officially a blogger. Maybe this is my attempt at a public diary... I'm much too impatient to actually write a diary with a pen. Who writes when you can type at least twice as fast? Oddly I find handwritten notes/letters/poem/anything extremely... personal. Well about me, Im a person, photographer, artist, poet, daughter, sister, cousin, and so many other words. So I guess we will just have to get to know eachother through this internet site... Maybe I'll spill a secret or two, just to keep you guessing.